Quiet Hearts
by AlkalineLeigh
Summary: Edward and Bella have grown up as best friends.As Bella realizes she's falling in love with him,will she be able to keep her feelings hidden to save their friendship?Or will everything change when she watches him fall for someone else? Summary inside.
1. Memories

**Summary: Raised together after her parents died in a car accident, Bella and Edward grow up with an unbreakable bond between them. In high school, however, Bella begins to see Edward as more than just her best friend. In fear of destroying everything they have together, Bella is terrified to tell him the truth, and instead stuffs everything down while she watches him fall in love with the epitome of perfection, Rosalie. As Bella learns the truth behind her parents lives and their deaths, her life spirals out of control. Will Edward be there for her when she needs him the most? What will happen if he finds out about Bella's true feelings? Will there be a happy ending? **

BPOV

I sat in the middle of my empty, run down motel room, staring at the dirty, waterlogged walls. How had I gotten myself here? Where did everything go wrong? It was my fault. Everything changed because I couldn't keep my stupid mouth shut, because I was too selfish to give him up. It felt like I'd lost my only reason for living. Now all I was left with were my memories. I thought about the last time I'd even spoken to Edward, how horribly I'd treated him. What I wouldn't give to take everything back.

_"Bella..." he trailed off, his eyes pleading. "Please, don't do this."_

_"I've given you everything I possibly can, and it's still not enough for you. I'll never be enough for you, or anyone. This is all I have left." I crossed my arms over my chest, feeling my protective walls collapsing.  
_

_"How can you say that? I can't do this without you. I can't do anything. This isn't right, I don't know what to do," he whispered, bearing that frantic look that made me want to hold him until the pieces of his soul fit back together. _

_"But you don't want me, and I can't do this anymore. Just leave, Edward, go away," I spat, channeling my anger from him to keep from crying. _

_"Can we please just talk? I don't want to lose you, Bella," he begged. _

_"I said go! Just leave me alone! GO!" My screams echoed off the walls. His shoulders slumped and his face suddenly looked so hopeless._

_"Bella, please, I'm sorry. If we just talked about things. Maybe if I had some time, maybe you're just confused-"_

_I cut him off, knowing I would break down at any given moment now. "Just. Go." __The last thing I saw was Edward's back as he walked away. I slammed my door shut and sank to the floor, feeling my entire life slowly slip away from me. And suddenly, nothing mattered anymore.  
_

From the beginning, it always felt like we were destined to be together, like he was my other half, just waiting until we were ready for each other. At least, that was how I felt when I realized that Edward was always going to feel like more than my best friend to me. We'd been raised together. We knew each other inside and out, like a favorite sweater, or a book that's been read until the cover is so warn that it's dangerously close to falling off. I don't think we could have ever gotten closer; he became my life and I became his. Our thoughts were always on the same wavelength. We always got into mischief together as kids. He jumped, and I would follow. As we grew older, we simply got closer, sharing more secrets with each other and learning who the other was like the backs of our hands.

When I was four years-old, my parents passed away. I hardly remember them at all; any memory I have is vague and blurry. They were hit by a drunk driver while coming home from a late dinner party. From what I'd been told, they had just picked me up from the sitter's and weren't very far from home. I was the only one who survived, making it out with a mild concussion and a broken shoulder. I was lucky. They died on impact.

I didn't feel their true absence until I got older, until the battered pieces of my past began to fit together. Carlisle and Esme had already been a part of my life, as my godparents, before they died – when they took me in, I guess I was just too young to really understand. No matter how many times I'd tried to remember things about my mother, Renee, I'd only come up with scraps. The sound of her voice, the way her hands felt, the way she baked me cookies. My father, Charlie, was more of a blur to me. I could remember his laugh and his curly hair. I remembered people telling me I had his eyes and his smile.

All through elementary and middle school, our effortless relationship grew. There was never an Edward without a Bella. He truly was my best friend in the entire world, the one person I could turn to for anything. The one person who knew me better than I did myself.

We all lived as a makeshift family in Seattle, Washington. We were always introduced as the Cullens, even though I kept my last name, Swan. Carlisle and Esme never adopted me. I asked Esme why when I was younger. She told me it was to respect my parents, because adopting me would be like canceling them out. I was still treated like her daughter, and Carlisle was really like a dad to me.

Everything changed when we started high school.

It was no secret that I was incredibly shy. Esme taught me how to assert myself well enough, but I always went to extremes to avoid unnecessary attention. Edward was a natural head turner. He smiled and the entire room was on him like paparazzi with the latest celebrity. With my reserved nature and Edward's social dominance, we balanced each other out together.

I expected high school to be just like middle school – I fit in better as "one of the guys" and left it at that. Apparently, that wasn't the case anymore. Boys were suddenly paying attention to me and trying to get me to notice them. And, apparently, Edward didn't take kindly to it. He noticed my new popularity before I did.

"You should hear what they're saying about you in the locker room," he growled at me one day. I blushed furiously, and tried to shrug him off. It was just Edward being protective, as usual.

On top of that, no one quite understood our living situation. People automatically assumed we were brother and sister. When we explained what we really were, all we got in return were confused looks. The only people who understood were our closest friends, Alice and Emmett. With Carlisle being a well respected and highly demanded doctor and Esme a well established interior designer, we never had any financial problems. It took a year for people to stop tagging us as "rich bitches". I never saw us as rich, just fortunate.

Edward easily fell into several different cliques. He identified with the jocks, the "musically talented", the math geeks; he pretty much got along the majority of the people in the school. He was the hot, nice guy that every girl on campus wanted. I, on the other hand, was limited in where I fit in. The only reason people really knew me was because of who my friends were. Between Edward, Alice and Emmett, I'd been introduced to the majority of the students. I didn't really know very many of them, though.

Things got harder half-way through our sophomore year. I suddenly found myself overbearingly protective of Edward…on the inside, at least. It bothered me tremendously when people assumed we were brother and sister. Suddenly, every decision I made somehow revolved around him, every thought I made included Edward and I didn't know how to make it stop. Growing up together, the bond we had was stronger than the average best friends', but I sometimes felt like it wasn't enough. Then I struggled with guilty feelings about even thinking that the relationship I had with him wasn't the best thing that had ever happened to me.

For the first time, I found myself keeping a secret from Edward. Probably the biggest secret I'd ever had in my entire life. The only reason I was terrified to tell him was because I knew it would destroy everything. I'd seen him with other girls. It was different than the way he was with me. I was only his Bella, not anything else. Telling him about the way I felt would only turn a valuable friendship and deep connection into a thing of the past. We would become the tattered remains of a once beautiful memory, and that terrified me.

Instead, I settled for stuffing it down, forcing myself to watch and be there for him while he fell in love with the exact mirror of what I couldn't ever be. The only thing that kept me going was hope. I hoped that one day, he'd wake up and see me as more than just his Bella. I'd hoped that he would see me as his everything, the exact same way that I saw him.

**I know, there are plenty of these stories out there. It's the clichéd "girl in love with best friend" story, but as every other author with a story like this will tell you, **_**this one is different than all the others**_**. Well, if you're willing to put up with me, read it and find out if it really is different from all the others. Depending on the response I get from it, I may write more, I may not. I've developed a bit of an obsession for this story topic, so I figured I'd write my own. You never know, you may like it. Anyway…please let me know what you think. I would really appreciate it. **

**P.S. This is shorter than the majority of the chapters will be – this is more of an intro. **


	2. Creeping

BPOV

My alarm blared, right next to my head, at 6:15 am. Groaning into my pillow, I slammed my hand on top of the nightstand and missed the snooze button on the devilish contraption. My palm just grazed the face of the alarm clock and sent it tumbling to the floor. Upon contact, it cracked and the battery pack went flying out. I'd broken yet another one.

"Damn it," I mumbled and rolled off of the pillows. Kneeling, I picked up the broken pieces of plastic off the ground and tossed them in the trash can under my desk. Outside, the gnarled clouds taunted me, threatening to rain. I glared at them and shuffled across my bedroom, making my way to the connected bathroom so I could shower. Washing my hair usually woke me up in the morning. Showering helped brighten my mood. The smell of my strawberry shampoo was comforting. It was one of the few things I remembered about my mother –she always smelled like the sweetest strawberries.

After wrapping myself tightly in a clean towel, I washed my face and brushed my teeth. With my hair also in a small towel, I walked back into my room and dug through the closet, trying to pick out an outfit. I grabbed a pair of dark jeans and found a white long sleeved t-shirt. After getting dressed, I tackled my tangled mane of hair. Assuming it would rain, I didn't bother drying it. Instead, I worked an anti-frizz serum through it and allowed it to dry however it wanted to. I wasn't expecting anything spectacular. Before going downstairs, I pulled on a pair of black Ugg boots and then went to find Edward.

His bedroom was down the hall from mine. His door was closed. I slipped my phone out of my pocket and checked the time. 6:48. It was still a little early, but I decided to get him up anyway. I knocked a few times. "Ed, you up yet?" I asked. No response. I knocked again. "Edward?" I pushed the door open to reveal him still curled up under the blankets, out cold. I sighed and walked over it him.

Perched on the edge of his bed, I rested my hand lightly on his shoulder and shook him gently. "Edward, you need to wake up," I said quietly. He wasn't a morning person, either. Waking him up rudely was never a good idea. He rolled over and made a small noise of protest. "Come on, gotta get up. School."

"No," he complained. "Go away."

I smirked and draped myself across his shoulder. "Up. Now." I demanded and nudged him. The corner of his mouth turned up in a smile. He squeezed his eyes shut and abruptly reached over his should and flipped me over his body so I crumpled in a heap next to him.

"Sleep," he begged.

"School," I laughed, out of breath. For a junior in high school, he acted like a seven year-old."We're going to be late if you don't get up. I'll go make breakfast."

After struggling to climb out of his massive bed, I left the room, making sure to leave the door open and letting cool air draft in. Now he would have to get up. Downstairs, I found Carlisle at the kitchen table sipping his coffee and reading the newspaper.

"Good morning," I said brightly. He looked up and smiled.

"Good morning, Bella. How did you sleep?" he asked.

"I slept pretty well. Did you get any sleep?" I asked. He nodded and went back to reading his paper. I dug through the fridge and pulled out some eggs, cheese, some vegetables and tortillas. I had the feeling we were going to end up eating on the way to school this morning, so I figured breakfast burritos would suffice. Esme came downstairs just as I was chopping up a bell pepper.

"Good morning, dear," she said, coming up from behind me to kiss my cheek.

"Morning, Esme," I said, my mouth full of a chopped piece of pepper. She chuckled and poured herself a cup of coffee, then joined Carlisle at the table. I quickly sautéed the vegetables and cooked the eggs. Thankfully, we had oversized tortillas. I rolled the burritos and wrapped them in a convenient napkin in case we made messes while eating. Edward still wasn't down stairs. It was now 7:33. School started at 8:00. I walked over to the stairs and sucked in a deep breath.

"EDWARD!" I shouted. "Food! Now!" I turned back to the kitchen and poured myself a glass of orange juice. Leaning against the counter, I gulped my first sip of it and set the glass down. Finally, I heard Edward's door open. He raced down the stairs and slid into the kitchen wearing a pair of dark, straight leg jeans and a cream colored sweater. His auburn hair looked perfectly messy. I sighed, not even wanting to think about how _my_ hair looked. He greeted his parents and then spotted the burritos on the counter, his eyes widening.

He plucked his massive breakfast off the counter and swung his backpack over his shoulder. Edward, as usual, insisted on driving. I scowled and sat in the passenger seat. The drive to school was crazy and erratic, also the norm for our daily routine. We got there with ten minutes to spare.

We both hurried into the school, running into Alice along the way. "Good morning!" she greeted us happily. I smiled, Edward grinned and we raced to English. The rest of the day went well. Edward and I had English, Trigonometry and Biology together. Alice and I had French together, and Emmett was in my P.E. class. My only class alone was a social behaviors class that I took as an extra elective—it counted towards history credits. By the time lunch rolled around, I didn't have much of an appetite. I was still full from breakfast. Everyone was already sitting at our usual table by the time I got through the mob of people in the crowded hallway.

I parked myself next to Edward and sipped a water slowly.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked, noticing that I wasn't eating.

"I'm fine, just not hungry," I answered. He narrowed his eyes.

"You're never _not_ hungry," he argued.

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean!" I chided, smacking his arm. He scoffed and nudged me. "Really, I just had a big breakfast."

"We need to go dress shopping," Alice suddenly announced. I looked up at her with a puzzled expression on my face.

"We do?" Emmett asked, clearly joking.

"Why?" I asked, clearly _not_ joking. Alice looked appalled.

"Winter Formal. Duh." We all stared at her.

"Alice…it's October. Formal isn't for another three months," I said slowly. "They aren't even selling tickets yet. We don't even know the theme." She looked defeated.

"Can we at least look?" she asked. I agreed, halfheartedly. And, of course, she towed me to the mall right after school, and it was raining. I sat for a few hours while Alice tried on five million different dresses. Coming from a person so small, that much excitement was just adorable; I couldn't stay grumpy for very long.

"What do you think of this one?" She asked, stepping out of the fitting room at Nordstrom's.

"That one's pretty," I commented. She sighed and sat down on the bench outside the door.

"I don't know why I'm even getting excited about this," she said quietly. Staring at a fixed spot on the ground, her shoulders drooped and she chewed on her lip. Alice's last boyfriend, Michael, moved out of state a few months ago. They'd been pretty serious—it ended badly. For weeks, Alice was crushed. It was like she'd forgotten how to smile for the first few days. "I should take this thing off. I guess I should have waited until someone asked me. _If_ anyone asks me," she sniffed and walked back into the fitting room.

A few moments later, she walked back out, clearly holding back tears. I swept her into a hug. "Oh, Alice, you're worth so much more than this. Let the past be the past." I tried to comfort her. "Do we need to go get ice cream?" She laughed into my shoulder and shook her head.

"No, it's okay. I need to keep my ass toned for when someone actually does ask me. They don't make 'em like this for nothing," she joked. I was relieved, glad to have the happy Alice back. And yes, she was perfectly toned in all the right places. If I didn't love her so much, I might have been jealous.

"What about you?" she asked. "You never really talk about guys anymore." Then she paused. "Well, it's not like you ever really talked about them before...are you even interested in anyone? Wait...Bella, are you a..." she said, drifting off. I nearly jumped.

"No! I am not!"

"Well, I was just wondering," she said, holding her hands up. "You _never_ talk about guys. I mean, it wouldn't bother me if you were, ya know."

"Well, I'm not." I said, blushing furiously.

"Oh, come on, don't be upset. Don't you at least have your eye on someone? There's gotta be at least one guy that you've got the hots for at school," she said with a wicked grin."I know Mike's got it bad for you."

"I don't know," I answered. "Not really. I mean, I'm not really looking for anyone. And please don't ever say that again." _Please don't ask anything more_, I added silently. She put a tiny finger on her chin, thinking.

"Maybe you could go with Emmett?" she suggested. I stopped walking immediately, trying not to laugh. "He's not dating anyone…" she trailed off. I smacked her arm playfully.

"Very funny."

"Well...you never know..." she trailed off.

"That's gross, he's like my brother. And he'd crush me."

By the time Alice dropped me off at home, I was exhausted. Shopping always did that to me, even when I wasn't the one doing the buying. The house was empty. Carlisle and Esme were still at work. I had no idea of where Edward was, though. He left a note taped to my bedroom door.

I walked into my room, dumped my backpack on the floor and pulled the note down.

**Went to the gym. Be back soon.**

** -Edward**

I stared at the note quizzically, then pulled out my phone and dialed Edward's number. He answered after the second ring, pretending not to know who was calling him.

"I hope you know, you're little note is complete bull crap," I said as soon as he picked up.

"Why do you say that?" he asked.

"We have a fitness room in our house. And you _never_ go to the actual gym. And I don't hear grunting men lifting weights behind you." It was true, Esme and Carlisle put together a home gym a few years ago—it really helped them blow off steam when they were stressed from work, and Esme was always overly careful about watching her figure. Sometimes, I worked out with her, but I usually was too lazy to get on a treadmill. Edward occasionally lifted weights and whenever he felt the need to really exercise, he usually went for a run outdoors.

"What if I'm in the locker room? And it doesn't matter, anyway. I'm on my way home now, _mother_. See you soon." Then he hung up. I snarled at the device in my hand and flopped on my bed. My eyelids continuously became more difficult to keep open and in a few minutes, I was passed out. My nap, however, didn't last very long. I became conscious with the feeling that someone was watching me. I slowly opened my eyes and jumped. Edward was sitting on my bed, his face inches away from mine.

"God, you are such a creeper," I gasped. He laughed and moved so I could sit up. "Where were you?" I asked.

"Ah, just around, you know, creeping. " he answered. I scoffed.

"Uh-huh, where's around?"

"It's a secret," he replied. My eyes narrowed, silently demanding him to tell me the truth. He didn't budge.

**AN: So, what do you guys think Edward was really doing? Review and let me know… I've got a few tricks up my sleeves. Well, maybe more than a few.. **** Get ready for some familiar faces in the next chapter!****Either way, review and let me know! The more reviews I get, the faster I'll get the next chapter out. **

**Thanks, everyone (:  
**


	3. Hummus and Grilled Tomatoes

BPOV

The next morning, things started off much differently than usual. I didn't wake up to an alarm clock, I woke up to an unusually cheerful Edward.

"Morning!" he said happily. I stared at him like he had three heads.

"What the hell…" I trailed off, confused.

"Come on, Bells! Time to get up!" He was acting like he was on crack, looking incredibly sexy at the same time. I wouldn't have minded waking up to this every morning... His hair was artfully tousled and he was still in his pajamas, wearing a tight, white t-shirt and grey sweats. I refused to get up and pulled the covers over my head.

"It's too early. Go. Away."

I thought he had gone, but a moment later, the covers were ripped off of me and Edward was lifting me out of the bed. I squealed and couldn't help but giggle childishly. "You're lucky I was wearing something under there," I joked.

Edward snorted, planted a kiss on my forehead and set me down in my bathroom. "Hurry up and get ready," he demanded. I glanced at the newly replaced alarm clock on my bed side table. It wasn't even six yet. I welcomed the hot water in the shower and cleaned myself up quickly. When I was finished, I pulled my hair into a French braid and rummaged around in the closet for some clothes. Pulling on a comfortable pair of jeans and a blue and white striped sweater, I threw on a pair of white Jack Purcell's and went downstairs. Edward was sitting on the counter with a bowl of cereal in his hands, chewing slowly.

"Ready to leave?" he asked. It was just past 6:00. The sun wasn't even up yet.

"Why are you in such a hurry to leave? Am I missing something? Or is there some obvious reason why we needed to get up before the sun? " I asked.

"You'll see. We gotta go now, or we _will_ be missing something. We'll get breakfast on the way to school." I hurried out of the house, curious, and sat in the freezing cold car.

"It's cold, put the heater on," I complained while he drove. He sighed and flipped the knob on and soon, hot air was wafting through the air vents. Edward was driving down an unfamiliar road. We'd lived in Seattle for the majority of our lives and I had no idea of where we were going. "Where are we going?" I asked.

"You'll see, be patient."

We drove for about five more minutes in silence. I still wasn't completely awake yet, nor in the best mood. By now, we were deep in what seemed to be a forest, and the sky was beginning to lighten up. He pulled off in a small clearing and got out of the car quickly, coming around to my side to open the door for me.

"Come on, we gotta hurry," he said, pulling my hand and towing me through the trees.

"Edward, this is crazy!" I hissed as he pulled me further into the trees. I hadn't noticed that we were coming to a small opening on a cliff face. As we got closer, I saw that there was a fallen over log, placed strategically on the ground so it served as bench. He sat down and motioned for me to sit next to him. The view was breathtaking, and the clouds were beginning to glow from the rising sun. I sat there, stunned.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" he asked. I nodded. "I thought it might be nice to watch the sun rise and wanted to bring you with me," he explained. I threw my arms around him.

"It's wonderful," I said. "Was this where you were yesterday?" I thought maybe he was here watching the sunset, seeing as how he was out late enough to do so.

"No, I did come here a couple weeks ago though," he answered. He still wouldn't tell me where he was, and it was really bothering me. We _never_ kept secrets from each other.

"Are you just not going to tell me? Cuz It's really bugging me," I complained. He sighed.

"Just relax and enjoy the view." So I did, and rested my head on his shoulder. We sat there for another twenty minutes, watching the sun get higher in the sky. When we both realized we might be late if we stayed there for much longer, we drove out of the forest and stopped at a small bakery not too far from school. Edward ran in and grabbed us a couple of blueberry muffins and some orange juice. I was starving and devoured the muffin. He laughed as he watched me and nibbled at his.

"Didn't you already eat cereal today?" I asked between mouthfuls. He shrugged.

"I'm a growing boy."

We got to school a few minutes earlier than usual and went to find Alice and Emmett. We found them with a few new faces. An incredibly tall and gorgeous blond with startling blue eyes was chatting animatedly with Emmett. When she smiled, my self-esteem took a nose dive. Even Edward seemed to be entranced by her. Next to the girl was a towering boy who seemed shy and reserved. He, too, was blond. Maybe these two were brother and sister?

"Hey, " Emmett said. "Look who I found lost in the guidance office?" He gestured at the blond, who flashed a breathtaking smile.

"Hi, I'm Rosalie," she introduced herself, holding out a hand toward Edward.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Edward, " he piped up. It seemed to me like he was trying to get the new girl's attention. Her eyes darted in his general direction and she grinned at him. Rosalie looked over at me and smiled.

"Hi, I'm Bella," I said.

"It's nice to meet you, too," she replied. "This is my brother, Jasper." I reached out and shook his hand. I got an odd feeling when I was next to him, like he knew my secrets. I wasn't quite sure if I liked it.

"Did you two just move here?" Edward asked, casually. "I don't think I've ever seen you on campus before." He wasn't ignoring Jasper, but I knew he was really speaking to Rosalie. My stomach clenched, like a small part inside me was dying. There was no way I would ever be able to compete with her. She was the epitome of a goddess.

Alice soon engaged Jasper in conversation. She laughed with her usual carefree nature and the conversation seemed to flow easily between the two of them. Edward, Rosalie, and Emmett had their own conversation going, which left me to be the awkward bystander. No one noticed when I excused myself and hurried over to my locked to grab my math book. I arrived to class a few minutes before everyone else and I felt my phone buzz in my pocket.

**Where'd you go?**

** -Alice**

I quickly tapped out a reply:

**Just went to class early. See you next period.**

** -Bella**

A few minutes later, people began to file into the class room and the seats around me were soon occupied, except for the one seat that I reserved for Edward. He came in looking happy. I smiled at him and moved my bag off the seat I'd saved for him. He sat down, taking out a piece of paper for notes and then exhaled quickly.

"So," he started. "Rosalie and Jasper are interesting, huh?"

"Yeah, where did they move from?" I asked.

"Didn't you hear Rosalie? They moved from Los Angeles. She said it when you were right in front of her." I chewed my lip nervously.

"I guess I just lost focus when she said it," I lied. Mr. Varner came into the classroom then and we began taking notes. By the end of the period, I was just as confused as I normally was. Edward usually helped me with the math homework, seeing as how I was _terrible_ at it. French was a breeze—Alice and I just screwed around in that class and passed each other ridiculous notes with immature drawings on them. Over the course of the year, we'd develope

I was surprised to see that Jasper was in my social behaviors class. Conversing with him one-on-one was much different. He was actually really easy to talk to…a little too easy. I could see him fitting in perfectly with us, like he was already a long time friend. The rest of the day went by normally. I didn't have any classes with Rosalie, which I didn't know how it felt about. Just because Edward was obviously interested in her didn't mean I had to dislike her, right? Maybe she was a really great girl, so I made myself to promise to try and get along with her.

On our way home, Edward was quieter than usual. I knew this game. All I had to do was wait for him to speak what was on his mind; three...two...one... "I have Spanish with Rose," he mentioned.

"Oh, that's cool," I said, trying to sound remotely excited.

"Yeah, it is." Then he paused, obviously thinking. "I think I might ask her out." For some unknown reasons, foreign tremors shook through my hands and stomach. They had to be nerves. "Do you think she'll say yes?" he asked.

"Of course she will," I said quickly. "Why would she say no? What's not to like?" He pulled into the driveway and I got out of the car, in a hurry to get inside the house. I didn't want him to see my face. I fumbled with the key and shoved it into the lock, then hurried up the stairs and closed my bedroom door. I had to go to work soon, so I pulled out my clothes for the job. I was a waitress at a local Greek restaurant called Lola. Edward and I constantly argued about me working.

_"Why do you feel the need to work your ass off at that place? You aren't getting anything out it!" he had said. I disagreed._

_"I am getting something out of this! I'm getting money for college! It's not your parents' responsibility to pay for me, I'm enough of a burden already," I replied._

Carlisle and Esme disagreed with me working to a certain extent as well. Esme constantly tried to reassure me that I wasn't a burden at all, Carlisle told me it was their pleasure to raise me as their own, but I had to face the hard fact that I was not their child, and they had no obligations whatsoever to pay for my tuition.

I sighed while thinking about it and dug through my dresser, trying to find a clean pair of black pants. I was expected to dress like any waitress for a fancy restaurant: black pants, black blouse, appealing shoes and my hair had to pulled back. Just as I found a clean uniform, there was a quiet knock on my door.

"Yeah?" I called out. The door open slowly and Edward peered into my room. Once he was sure that I had all my clothes on, he stepped into the room and sat on my bed.

"Is everything okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, everything's fine…why do you ask?" I asked.

"You just seemed upset a few minutes ago. I just wanted to make sure you weren't."

"I'm just in a hurry, I have to get ready for work. My shift's in an hour," I explained. His face fell.

"Oh…want me to drive you there?" His offer was sweet, but I declined.

"No, that's okay," I said. "I'm working an extra hour, I don't want you to have to come back and get me at ten tonight. Don't worry about it. Oh, would you turn around? I need to get dressed." He rolled over on my bed so he was facing the wall and continued the conversation.

"Is that creep still bugging you?" he asked. I shuddered slightly. A totally perverted older man had it a habit of coming to the restaurant and requesting me as his waitress. At first I thought it was just because he liked my suggestions. Then I realized it was just because he was hitting on me. I had complained to the manager, but there was nothing they could do, even though my boss knew the guy was all over me.

"Yeah, it's like he knows my schedule. It's really weird," I answered, tucking my shirt into my pants. "I'm done, you can turn around now."

"If he comes in tonight, call me and I'll go kick his ass," Edward said. I laughed gently and sat next to him on the bed.

"Calling you would most likely get me fired, but it's a nice gesture." He sat up and put his hand on my shoulder.

"I'm serious, Bella. That guy's like stalking you. It's freaking me out. At least text me?"

I agreed to do it and left a few minutes later. I parked out back, behind the restaurant and tied my apron around my waist before going in. As soon as I clocked in, I grabbed my booklet with my order pad in it and went out to the dining room. It was still pretty empty; the dinner rush hadn't started yet. I walked over the greeter's podium and chatted casually with Becky, the hostess. She was only a few years older than me and was attending a local college.

A few moments later, our boss, Harold, came out from his office with an unfamiliar boy behind him. "Hi, Bella," Harold greeted me.

"Hi, Harry, how's it going?" I asked.

"It's going wonderfully, thank you. I have a job for you to do," he announced. I waited for him to get to the punch line.

"Alright, what's up?"

He motioned to the boy next to him. "This is Jake. He's new here and needs someone to show him the ropes. That someone is going to be you." The boy, Jake, smiled at me and waved.

"Hi," he said nervously.

"Hi there," I replied. "Well, since there's not that many people right now, I guess it would be a good time to practice a few things. Have you ever waited tables before?" By now, Harry had left and gone back to his office. Jake looked like he was around my age. And he hadn't ever waited tables before.

"Have you ever had a job before?" I asked, trying not to sound rude.

"I worked at Taco Bell," he answered and cracked a smile.

"Well, I guess we've got a long road ahead of us," I sighed. "Let's get started."

The rest of the night was exhausting. Jake picked up on the tips that I gave him pretty quickly. He wasn't what I would call a natural—he only dropped a few plates and got a couple of orders mixed up—but we'd definitely had worse in this place. It seemed like it was especially busy tonight. Around 8:30, Becky tapped me on the shoulder when I walked past her with a tray of drinks.

"Hey, Bella," she whispered. I turned to look at her, slowing my brisk walk. "Perv in the corner. He's requested you again." Dread seeped into my core. I sighed, practically growled, and hurried to drop the drinks off at the table they belonged to. The party still needed a few minutes to look over their menus, so I shuffled over to that forsaken table.

"Hi there, my name's Bella, I'll be your waitress tonight. Can I get you started with a drink?" I asked, with a fake smile plastered to my face.

"Hi, Bella," he said with his sickening nasally voice. He pointed at his menu with a ballpoint pen."What's this cocktail made of? I can't read that closely," he said. I looked at the menu and saw that he was asking about a Hurricane.

"That's a Hurricane, sir, it's made with lime juice, passion fruit syrup, and rum," I explained. He waggled his eyebrows and "accidentally" dropped his pen.

"Oops..." he said. "Could you grab that for me, sweetcakes?" Bile rose in my throat, but I dutifully bent down and picked the pen up. I swear, I could feel his eyes down his pants.

"Here you go," I said, handing it back to him. He grabbed my hand with his disgusting, meaty claw and thanked me, smiling widely. I just nodded and took his order.

When I got home, I dragged myself up the stairs and somehow managed to make it into my room without falling asleep on the way. I unbuttoned my uncomfortable shirt and untucked it from my pants before ripping them off and throwing them across the room. I thought about the nights events and shuddered, then crawled under the covers and fell into a deep sleep, not even caring that I smelled like walking hummus and grilled tomatoes

**AN: So, how'd you like the perv? I bet every single one of us has come across at least one guy like that in our lives. I sure have. Anywho, forget about the perv in the corner, how about telling me if you liked the chapter in general? It'd mean a lot to me (: How'd you like the new faces?  
**


	4. Pastries and Reproduction

**BPOV**

For the next week, things were seemingly perfect. Rosalie and Jasper were getting closer with everyone; Emmett and Edward were infatuated with Rosalie; they both watched her while she walked, ogling at her legs and curves whenever they thought no one was looking. Guys.

Jasper and Alice hit things off nicely. Apparently, someone had raised Jasper the right way, because he was the epitome of a perfect gentlemen. I knew Alice was interested in him almost immediately. Everything was great. Until Friday.

I'd come to really enjoy my social behaviors class now that I had a friend with me. Jasper sat next to me every day and we'd taken up passing notes and whispering during lectures. What neither of us expected on Friday morning was a Socratic discussion in class. In my opinion, they were always a pain in the ass to do, with the rearranging all of the desks into a circle and then everyone trying to talk over each other in order to throw their opinions out there about a seemingly pointless topic. It didn't seem worth the effort. But, hey, if it's named after Socrates, it must be important.

Our teacher, Mr. Novak, stood at the head of the class when the bell rang and cleared his throat. "Alright everyone, today we're having a Socratic discussion. New rule, everyone has to speak at least once or your participation grade goes down." A large chunk of the class groaned in unison. "Relax, the discussion won't take up the entire period. You all can have free time at the end."

Setting up didn't take very long. The usual suck-ups orchestrated the entire thing, pulling the unused desks out of the way and pointing loners in the right direction. Jasper and I pushed our desks under the classroom window and sat down. Once everyone had settled, Mr. Novak sat down at his desk and we waited for him to reveal the topic discussion. When everyone quieted down, he cleared his throat again.

"Today's discussion is about sex. I don't care how uncomfortable that makes you feel, this is a social behaviors class, not home economics. What do you find stimulating or attractive? What drives people to have sex?"

My entire face felt like it had exploded. Jasper chuckled nervously. At first, there was an awkward silence. Then, Mike Newton jumped in.

"Well, we all love it when a girl goes down—" Mr. Novak cut him off.

"I don't mean stimulating in that sense, Newton. Good lord. Think Freudian psychology, you know, sex and aggression."

"You mean...liking it rough?" he asked. The guy next to Mike, Tyler, suddenly burst out laughing. He was completely immature and suffered from severe facial acne. Mr. Novak sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Michael, we don't want to hear anything else about your minuscule sex life, so unless you have something valuable to say, shut your mouth."

More people started to jump in after that, comfortable after the teacher completely humiliated the class jerk. The boys talked about what they found physically attractive in girls. For example: big boobs, a nice ass, dimples, and bedroom eyes. Any rude or derogatory comment was made by Mike, of course. He couldn't take a hint. I sighed and rolled my eyes. Jasper snorted at my reaction. Mr. Novak, apparently, didn't think the discussion was going in the right direction.

"Now that we know what guys find physically attractive in women, let's talk about personality traits. Speak up ladies, I'm not hearing enough out of you."

Mike perked up again. "She CANNOT be clingy. That's the biggest turn off." I sighed again, irritated. Jasper stiffened next to me, irritated.

"Sure, Newton, clingy isn't all that great, but you make it sound like a girlfriend should be a robot programmed specifically to your desires, and it doesn't work that way. You wonder why you're single." Jasper scoffed. "Why don't you try liking a girl for who she is on the inside?"

Clearly interested now, Mr. Novak sat up in his chair. "What do you think would be the ideal woman, Jasper?" he asked. Jasper swallowed nervously.

"Well…I don't think there is such thing as the 'ideal woman' that would be ideal for everyone. I think she should be a happy and fun person who's not afraid to express herself or speak what's on her mind. Someone who isn't afraid of a commitment or to show you how she feels. She should be someone who makes you want to be a better person, not some bimbo who gives good blow jobs. At least, that's how it is for me." The entire time while he was speaking, I was making small connections with his words and events that had occurred throughout the week. I knew exactly who he was talking about. I smiled at him and gave him a small nudge. His moving speech got the other girls in class to speak up. I thought I was in the clear until Mr. Novak singled me out.

"Bella, we haven't heard anything from you. Please, share with us your opinion on a successful relationship." I stared at me desk, embarrassed as hell, and tried to compose my response.

"I don't think relationships can function without trust, and I think that kind of trust is gradually earned, not automatically instilled…" I trailed off before I could get ahead of myself. "Like, the trust you have between yourself and a best friend. If the relationship is based on a deep level of trust and friendship, I think it will definitely last." I hadn't realized what I had said until the discussion had ended. I wracked my brains, trying to come up with an excuse if anyone asked me about Edward. Thankfully, no one in class seemed to notice.

When Jasper and I pulled our desks back to their rightful spots, we plopped down in our seats, separated by an awkward tension.

"Can I ask you something?" Jasper asked.

"Go for it."

"Why don't you just tell him?" My jaw threatened to drop. _ He knew_.

"Tell who? And what?" I asked, playing dumb.

"Edward. And you know what I'm talking about." I refused to look at him. How did he figure it out?

"No…I don't," I lied. He placed his hand lightly on my shoulder.

"I can see it in your eyes, how much you love him. And I can see how much it hurts you when he's crooning over my sister, too." I knew I couldn't argue with him. Instead, I tried to back him into a corner.

"So what? Like you weren't talking about Alice in your little motivational speech a few minutes ago," I retorted.

"You're right, I was," he said. "Because I think she's perfect. I just haven't found the right time to tell her." He stared at me with an eyebrow raised. "I think you need to find the right time to tell Edward," he stated. My gut clenched.

"I can't, Jasper. It would ruin everything we have. He's happy now with the way things are, and I know he's planning on asking Rosalie out, anyway. He's my best friend in the entire world, Jazz. I won't destroy that." I hadn't realized that my voice was shaking, even though we were whispering.

"You could make him so happy, Bella," Jasper encouraged me. If I hadn't known any better, I would have thought that Jasper was coming on to me, but I knew he was gifted with an extraordinarily innate sense of empathy. He identified well with other people, and that was something I had picked up in the short time I'd known him.

"Please, don't tell _anyone_," I begged.

"Don't worry, I won't. It'll be our little secret, alright?"

I smiled shyly, knowing my cheeks hadn't cooled from the moment I walked into this classroom. The bell rang a few moments later and everyone rushed out of the room, buzzing with excitement from the period's events. Every day, Edward swung by the classroom so we could walk to Bio together. I saw him across the hall and waved.

"Cullen!" Mike exclaimed. "Best class, right there," he said, pointing the room we had just stepped out of. "You are so missing out." Edward eyed me curiously. I didn't say anything, so he turned to Jasper.

"What am I missing?" he asked. Jasper snorted and shook his head.

"A Socratic discussion about sex. Apparently, it's the most excitement Newton's had in a while." I laughed once and Edward ruffled my hair.

"So that's why she's so red," he mused. "Poor thing." Jasper excused himself and walked to his next class. Edward linked his arm through mine and we walked across campus.

"I asked Rosalie out to the movies," he said excitedly. I swallowed my feelings quickly and punched him playfully in the shoulder.

"That's great, Ed! Are you two going out tonight?" I asked.

"You didn't ask me if she said yes," he protested. I rolled my eyes.

"That was a given, and besides, you wouldn't be so happy if she turned you down." He chuckled and launched into the full blown story of how he asked her and how she responded.

"We're going out tonight. I mean, it _is_ Friday. I told her she could pick the movie. I bet we'll end up seeing 'Letters to Juliet' or some chick flick like that," he explained. I scrunched my face at him.

"Edward, that movie came out a few months ago. She's probably already seen it. I bet she'll choose 'Killers'. It comes out today, and it's supposed to be funny. Plus, it's got Ashton Kutcher in it."

Edward stopped at his locker to grab his textbook and eyed me strangely. "How is that even relevant?"

"He's hot," I said simply. He scoffed and shoved me.

"I disagree."

"Good," I replied. "I would be a little worried if you didn't." Edward pulled open the classroom door and we walked in, taking our usual seats. We were still laughing about our previous conversation as we got out paper for notes ready. Then I looked up at the board to the read the agenda, which read:

NOTES: SEXUAL REPRODUCTION

VIDEO: THE MIRACLE OF LIFE

Edward groaned and put his arm around my shoulder. "You already look like a tomato."

The video was horrifying, but it wasn't like I hadn't seen it before. All life-science focused curriculum entailed a video of a woman giving birth. The rest of the day went as normal as it could be. But Edward's date with Rosalie nagged at me.

By the time school got out, I knew I would be spending the night alone. Alice came bouncing over to me, excited, as I walked over to Edward's car to wait for him.

"Jasper asked me out!" she squealed. "I had hoped he would, but I had no idea that he likes me!" I feigned surprise and hugged her happily.

"That's great, Alice! What are you two going to do?"

"He asked me out to dinner and movie," she said, still smiling. "I think we should go see 'Killers'." My stomach knotted. Somehow, I got the feeling this would turn into a double date. "I have to go get ready!" Then she ran over to her car and sped off.

I waited for Edward, resting against the frame of the car. When I saw him walking across the parking lot, I smiled and gestured for him to unlock the car. I heard the locks click open and I got into the passenger seat. A few moments later, he climbed in and exhaled quickly.

"We have to get home quickly," he said.

"Why? What's the rush?"

"I'm picking Rosalie up in an hour. We're going to dinner before the movie." This day just kept getting better and better. He drove like a maniac all the way home and hurried upstairs to get ready. I took my time and walked slowly up the stairs to my room, closing the door behind me.

I flopped on my bed and pulled out my cell phone. I thought about calling work to see if they were short handed. Then I decided against it, knowing they probably were. My day had been bad, but going to work would probably make it worse. Pulling my hair up into a ponytail, I grabbed my biology text book and worked on some homework until Edward knocked on my door.

"I'm leaving in a few minutes," he said, sitting down on my bed. He'd showered and changed his clothes. "Do you have plans for tonight?"

"Oh, I'm just going to stay home tonight and relax. I'm kinda tired." He eyed me quizzically and shrugged.

"Okay. Well, I'm gonna go then." He stood up and brushed off his shirt.

"Hope you have a good time," I offered. As soon I heard him pull out of the driveway, I went downstairs to the kitchen. When I was depressed, I cooked. A lot. Being in the kitchen always raised my spirits. I thought it was a beautifully designed room, thanks to Esme. The countertops were made of dark blue granite that always seemed to gleam, calling my name. The appliances were matched perfectly, everything stainless steel. It was like my safe haven.

In twenty minutes, all of the burners on the stove were in use, boiling sauces and sautéing different vegetables. I was working on a pie crust when Esme came home. She must have heard me pounding puff pastry on the counter, because she walking into the kitchen looking slightly disheveled.

"Hi sweetheart…" she trailed off. I threw my weight into the pastry dough, working butter into each extremely thin layer.

"Hi, Esme," I said, out of breath.

"Is everything alright?" she set her purse down on the kitchen table and approached me. She knew me too well. I pounded on the dough again.

"Just had a bad day," I said shortly. She hoisted herself onto the countertop where I was working, unbothered by the flour she got on her black designer slacks.

"Where's Edward?" she asked, making friendly conversation.

"He's on a date with Rosalie," I answered, now abusing my creation with a rolling pin. I looked up at her quickly and saw that her facial expression had gone from casual Esme to maternal and understanding Esme. Sometimes, I thought she saw through my façade completely, like she thought Edward and I were _supposed_ to be together. But then my rational mind would kick in.

"Oh…" Esme trailed off. "Well…what's for dinner?"

* * *

Carlisle came home almost an hour later in his usual good mood and the three of us ate dinner together.

"Do I smell pie?" Carlisle asked when I was clearing the table off.

"Yes, you do. Cherry," I said. "It's been in the oven since you got home. It's almost done." When it was done and had cooled, we ate dessert together as well. I went back to my room to finish homework in much a better mood than when I had left it earlier.

Around nine o'clock, I was just finishing the rest of my math homework when my phone rang. I answered without looking at the caller ID.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Hey, You," Alice replied.

"How was the date?" I was surprised she was home by now, it was a little early for a typical Alice date.

"It was _amazing_. Jasper is so…different. He makes me feel like I'm the only girl in the world, and he's such a gentleman. We're going out again this weekend." I smiled, happy for her.

"That's really good to hear, Al." After the way her last boyfriend treated her, Jasper was the perfect guy to fix her heart. "How was the movie?" She paused.

"Actually, Jasper and I left in the middle of the movie."

"Why?" I asked, curious.

"Well, he was really grossed out and I was a little weirded out too, but we ran into Edward and Rosalie there." My smile fell off of my face.

"Oh…and that was weird?" I asked.

"No, not the running into them part…they were kind of sucking face a few rows away from us, so we decided to leave."

"That's…lovely," I said, trying to sound indifferent. I'm sure I failed miserably at it. Edward _never _acted like that with his girlfriends; public displays of affection weren't really his thing. At least they weren't in the past. I didn't know how things were now.

"Yeah, it was real nice," she said sarcastically. "I mean, if they want to do that in a movie theater, at least do it in a different auditorium that's not filled with people actually wanting to see the film. God."

We talked for a few more minutes until I started yawning. Alice was still giddy from excitement, but willingly got off the phone with me. After I changed into my pajamas, I popped one of my favorite movies, _Pride and Prejudice_, into the DVD player and watched Darcy and Elizabeth fall hopelessly in love with each other until I fell asleep.

**AN: I really hope you all liked this one. Things are going to really start picking up in the story now. You find out where Edward keeps disappearing to in the next chapter. Let me know what you liked or didn't like (: Muchas Gracias! **

**P.S. I know 'Killers' came out a while ago, but there aren't any good chick flicks out right now other than Eclipse...and I refuse to allow Edward and Rosalie to suck face during such an amazing film.  
**


	5. Surprise

BPOV

Saturday. It's the day that you get to sleep in and relax, right? Well, not exactly. Edward, again, woke up me in an uncharacteristically happy mood.

"Bella, wake up," Edward said, shaking me gently. I peeled me eyes open and shot him a look of death. The light burned.

"It's _Saturday_, Ed. Why the hell are you waking me up at," I peered at the alarm clock, "eight thirty?" I moaned miserably and ducked my head under the covers. I was usually the one who woke Edward up, not the other way around, especially on weekends. And even though 8:30 was actually later than I normally slept in, I was unusually exhausted.

"Because we have things to do today, that's why. Now, don't be a grouch. Get up and be happy."

"Ugh. You suck. Go back to bed," I mumbled into my pillow. I felt his gentle touch on the back of my neck, slowly tickling me. I curled up and stifled a laugh. He knew my tickle spots.

"Don't make me do it," he threatened. I didn't move, and in seconds, I burst out into loud and uncontrollable laughter as he tickled me mercilessly.

"Stop!" I screeched, "Please!" He eventually gave in to my pleading and stopped, allowing me to breathe. He ruffled my already tweaked hair and sat on the edge of the bed. "C'mon, get ready to go, I'll make us some breakfast."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You can't cook to save your life."

"True," he agreed. "But I've got a few tricks up my sleeves."

When he left, I sighed and shuffled over to the bathroom, turning on the water to allow it to heat up. I was actually relieved when I woke up to see Edward. Starting my day out with him always made things seem better than they really were, like it was easier to breathe. After I had showered, I plugged in my blow dryer and attached a diffuser to the end. Then I worked a curl-up mousse into my hair and let the blow dryer do its magic, forming my hair into decent, natural looking curls. Since it was a Saturday and I wasn't in much of a hurry, I decided to wear some makeup, applying a thin line of black eyeliner and smudging it to add a smoky effect. I had extreme difficulty applying my mascara, as always. I didn't bother smearing on lip gloss; I knew I was going eat when I got downstairs.

In a much better mood now, I pulled out a silky, blue, ¾ sleeved baby doll top. It tied under the bust line with a bow. I also found a pair of black skinny jeans to wear with it. Before I left the room, I slipped on a pair of white flats and hurried down the stairs, hoping I hadn't taken too long. I was surprised when I saw Edward. He was wearing an outfit that was incredibly similar to mine…at least, color wise. He was wearing a white long sleeves pushed up over his forearms, dark wash straight leg jeans and navy blue Vans. I smirked when I saw him.

"Well, don't you look lovely," I commented.

"Likewise, gorgeous," he replied with a wink. My heart skipped a beat. Set out on the table were two plates across from each other, adorned with what appeared to banana pancakes, one of our favorites. Esme used to make them for us all the time when we were little. I sat down in front of a plate and Edward sat across from me, immediately taking a huge bite. I eyed the food curiously.

"There's no way you made this," I said. He looked up at me with his mouth still full.

"Eat," he commanded. I took a bite, and stifled a moan. It was _delicious_. There was _definitely_ no way he'd made these himself.

"Where'd you pick this up from?" A huge grin stretched out over his face.

"Original House of Pancakes," he replied. We both laughed. "I called in for a favor and they made them in advance," he explained. Esme's profession caused us to have a lot of connections; She had designed the head chef's home for a really great price. Because she did such a great job, he offered us free breakfast a lot. Edward often took advantage of these opportunities, especially when it came to food. "Luckily, you took so freakin' long in the shower that I made it back in time to set this up."

"Thanks," I said shyly. I suddenly noticed that Carlisle and Esme weren't around. "Where's your mom and dad?"

He shrugged. "They left a little while ago. I guess they had an errand to run or something."

Feeling like a cow, I wolfed down the rest of the pancakes and downed the glass of orange juice Edward had set next to my plate. He watched me, amused.

"Hungry?" he asked.

"Not really, it's just good," I said, finishing the last mouthful. He laughed and took my plate to the sink for me. "What's with all this? Waking me up, buying me breakfast, cleaning up for me…?"

"What? I can't do something nice for my best girl every now and then?" he asked, grabbing his car keys off the counter. I blushed and flashed him a quick smile.

"So, are we watching the sun rise again?" I asked, wondering why he had gotten me up so early.

"No, it's too late for that," he said, pointing to window. The sun was actually shining today. "It's almost eleven."

"Oh…then what are we doing?" I asked, my face hot. That was a really dumb question.

"Wanna go get your nails done?"

I choked back a laugh and tried to look serious. "Edward…that is _so_ gay. Do you have something you need to tell me?" He narrowed his eyes.

"No. I was going to _sit_ with you while you got them done. I just feel bad because I left you alone last night and I know you didn't go out and do anything. Besides that, I know guys on the football team who've manicures before."

"Are you serious? That's just...not right. And you'd go sit in an acetone infested nail salon with tittering Asian women just to watch me get my nails painted?" I laughed slightly and shook my head. He frowned.

"Maybe…" he said, clearly unsure.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. How about we just go to the book store? I need to grab a few new books." He perked up at my suggestion. "But," I said, stopping him before he grabbed his keys. "I'm driving. In my car."

Edward hated it when we didn't drive his car. He claimed mine made him feel like a lumber jack. Carlisle and Esme offered to buy me a new car on my 16th birthday, but I refused and insisted on paying for my own vehicle. All I could afford was a used, practically geriatric pick-up truck. Edward was appalled when I pulled into the driveway with it after I'd bought it, but I'd already fallen completely in love with it. Sure, the paint was chipped and faded in certain spots, but who doesn't like an old red truck? The one thing I did let Carlisle and Esme pay for was a new engine, considering it wouldn't start after I'd had the truck for a few weeks. Now, when I started her up, she purred like a kitten. Well...an angry kitten.

He grumbled, but gave in and sat in the passenger seat. It took us twenty minutes to get to the book store. The entire way there, he was fiddling with my radio, trying to find a decent station before giving up and shutting it off. He sighed and propped his elbow against the window. "Piece of crap," I heard him mutter.

"What's wrong?" I asked, ignoring his comment. "You can't seriously be this bummed about not getting to drive."

"I'm not bummed," he said. "I'm really happy, actually."

"Why so happy?"

"Last night was really great," he said bluntly. I bit my tongue on accident and winced.

"Oh, yeah," I feigned interest. "How did it go?" He didn't hesitate to launch into his extremely detailed recount of his night.

"Rosalie is unlike any girl I've ever met," he said, droning on and on about how amazing he thought her personality was. "When I'm with her, it's like we've known each other our whole lives. Like she's _the one_," he elaborated.

"Edward, it was one date. Don't you think you're getting a little ahead of yourself?" I tried really hard to focus on driving.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Maybe I'm getting ahead of myself. She's just...different."

"So… did you kiss her?" I asked, knowing the truth.

"Yeah," he sighed. Then he continued to talk about her. When I pulled up to Barnes and Noble's, he snapped back into his self and helped me pick out my books. Our relationship had always been effortless. In fifteen minutes, he was already pulling books off the shelves that he knew I would like. We ended up spending a few hours in there, skimming through different novels and magazines. I thought it was a great way to waste a Saturday and was prepared to spend a couple more hours there, but Edward suddenly jumped up.

"It's almost three," he said. "Let's go back home, I'm hungry."

"Um…okay," I complied, putting my book back in its rightful spot of the shelf. This time, he _refused_ to let me drive, even though it was my truck.

"What the hell!" I protested as he snatched the keys from my hand.

"Your truck is bad enough, don't make me put up with your granny driving too."

I got into the passenger seat and slammed my door with unnecessary force, causing my truck to rock slightly. "It is _not_ granny driving. I just so happen to abide the laws of the road, thank you very much."

"Easy there, tiger," Edward said with a small chuckle. I legitimately thought we were going home until he turned onto the freeway.

"This isn't the way home," I stated. "Edward…" He chuckled and shook his head slowly.

"You really need to calm down, Bells. I'm just taking a different route."

I almost believed him when he turned off the freeway a few exits later, but still continued in the wrong direction and pulled into a parking lot to the city's arboretum. I eyed him curiously.

"Why are we at the arboretum? I didn't bring a camera to take pictures…" I'd always loved the arboretum. Just walking around inside with all of the different trees made me feel so peaceful, like I didn't have a care in the world.

"No, but I did," he said, producing a small digital camera. "Smile!" He pressed the capture button and it flashed at me. I blinked a few times, but got out of the car, suddenly very happy.

He walked around the car to meet me and gripped my hand, pulling me over to the entrance. I sighed when I saw the huge, beautiful maple tree greeting us. Edward snapped another picture of me, and then led me along an elongated and familiar bridge. I'd been here many times before, but he pulled me past all of my favorite trees until I noticed an unfamiliar tarp in a small clearing. Under the tarp was a large table with several chairs around it.

"What is this?" I asked.

He pulled me forward into the clearing and, right on cue, I was bombarded with a loud chorus of "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BELLA!" And then everyone sprang out from behind trees with party hats. Alice, Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, Carlisle, Esme, and other friends from school were all there, laughing at my reaction. Edward was still taking pictures. I stared at him incredulously.

"Thanks you guys," I said shyly, "…but my birthday's not for two days." Alice rolled her eyes and pulled me into a hug.

"Your birthday's on a Monday. You can't have an amazing party like this on a Monday." Esme set a large cake on the table and was pulling various other food dishes out from some unknown place and laying them out. I turned to Edward, who was smirking.

"This is what I've been doing for the past week, in case you were wondering. They normally don't let people do this, but I called in another favor," he explained. I threw my arms around him. He hugged me back and placed a small kiss on my forehead.

"Thank you," I said, happily, not focusing all of the attention I was getting. I was just happy. "You and your 'favors'."

"Well, you only turn seventeen once, and you always make my birthday special for me. I wanted to do this for you."

After the shock of being totally surprised wore off, we sat down together and ate like there was no tomorrow. Edward was camera happy, snapping pictures and then handing the device to someone else to take pictures with. Carlisle and Esme both hugged me obsessively, also taking pictures of their own. It was nice being able to have a moment like this with everyone I cared about, but the constant attention was starting make me feel a little bit flustered. Esme was pulling out candles for the cake when a park attendant came out of nowhere, pushing a huge barrel filled with gifts.

"Happy birthday, dear," the attendant said. I recognized her; her name was Darcy—I'd been here so many times that the people know who I was. Esme set up my cake and lit them all while everyone sang. My face was burning bright red, I could feel it, and blowing out seventeen candles was quite a challenge. I did it, though, and everyone cheered.

The cake was delicious. A moist, decadent chocolate cake filled with strawberry mousse. I ate slowly, hoping we wouldn't get to the gifts, but Alice and Rosalie rushed me.

"Come on, Bella, we want you to open presents," Rosalie begged. Even though she wasn't my favorite person in the world right now, I gave in and allowed Edward to hand me presents from the bin.

I received a new purse from Alice. It was a beautiful designer bad that I didn't think I would ever use in fear of destroying it. I thanked her, and then chastised her for spending so much money on a gift. Rosalie gave me a new silk pajama set, including soft, fluffy slippers. She laughed when she saw my surprise at what it was.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't know what you'd like."

"It's perfect," I said, giving her a small hug. "I actually just had to get rid of my last slippers because I ran outside in wet grass with them."

Emmett, as a joke, bought me a gigantic first aid kid. He booming laugh echoed through the trees when I tore open the wrapping paper and sighed.

"Look, Bella! Band-aids!" He chortled. Then he pulled out a small card and gave it to me. Inside was a gift store to Bath and Body Works.

"You always smell good," he explained, still laughing.

Jasper gave me a beautiful, leather bound journal. It even had a buckle around it, like something you'd see an archeologist with. It was perfect, and he knew it. My other friends, who weren't very close to me, gave me small, silly things that I'm sure they thought had meaning. I thanked everyone of them sincerely.

We were just finishing up with cleaning all of the wrapping paper and food when fat rain drops began to fall from the sky.

"Thank god Edward set up a tarp," Alice said, covering her hair anyway. Rosalie agreed and did the same. The three of us huddled under the cover, trying to keep from getting wet. I didn't notice Edward come up behind me. Suddenly, my feet were swept out from underneath me and I was being held securely in his arms. The drops were falling much faster now in a steady sheet of water.

"Like I said, you only turn seventeen once," he said, and then dashed into the water. It slapped against our faces, but I couldn't help laughing.

"Edward! Don't you dare!" I shouted. "No!" But my words came out between giggles. We were soaked, yet he still twirled me around, making sure my clothes were drenched completely. Everyone else was laughing with us. He walked us back under the tarp and set me down. Alice was still laughing, but her laughter cut off quickly when I caught her in a giant, sopping wet hug. Then she was mad.

"My hair! My clothes!" she shouted. The she got over it and laughed with me. I thought this day had gone absolutely perfectly. Carlisle and Esme were cleaning up together, somehow managing to look totally in love with one another while doing it, and people had already started saying goodbyes and running to their cars.

Everything took a nose dive when Edward came up to me with that dumb grin on his face again. "Do you mind if I go out with Rosalie tonight? I promised her I'd help her catch up on a few things in Spanish. Her last school was a little behind us." . _Of course I flippin' mind. _

"Oh…no, not at all," I lied.

"I'm going to go change real quick, but I'll leave with her so you have a way to get home." I wasn't expecting him to be leaving right now.

"You have extra clothes?" I asked, appalled.

"Of course, I planned everything. I knew it was going to rain. Alice has some clothes for you, don't worry." He winked and ran over toward the bathrooms to change into the set of dry clothes he brought with him, while I was left dripping wet, and now alone.

I watched Edward and Rosalie walk off together under the umbrella he'd also remembered to bring. . I felt someone's warm hand on my shoulder as I watched them. I looked up to see Jasper.

"Don't get yourself hung up on them, Bella. It's not going to last."

"How can you say that? She's your sister, Jazz. Shouldn't you want her to be happy?" I asked, grateful for his warmth. I was freezing.

"Of course I do. But I don't think they're going to work. Look, Rosalie breaks hearts and goes through guys like toys. It's just who she is. "

"Edward's different. He's not your average guy," I argued.

"You're right, he may be different, but he's also a blind ass who left his best friend alone at the birthday party he organized for her." We looked at each other in silence. I gave up.

"I'm not going to dwell on it. He's happy, and the party was fun. Let's just leave it at that." Then I walked over over to Alice, shivering, and demanded my clothes. She handed them over quickly and dragged me to the bathrooms so we could change.

Alice and Jasper left together after we finished everything. They had plans to go out again tonight. Esme and Carlisle had already left, so I thanked the park attendants and hurried out to my car. I blasted the heater and drove home quickly, wanting a hot shower.

When I got home, I set my gifts on the bed and went to shower. After I'd finished, I was exhausted and ready for bed, so I pulled on my pajamas and found places for my gifts in the closet. While I looked for a place on my bookshelf the journal Jasper had gotten for me, a note slipped out of the front cover. I stooped down to pick it up and read what it said.

_Bella,_

_We all have our fair share of secrets. This journal is for you to keep yours in. Hopefully, someday, they won't need to be hidden anymore._

_-Jasper_

I sighed and crawled into bed with the journal tucked under my arm. Grabbing a pen, I sat with it propped on my knees. Not knowing what else to do, I scribbled all of my emotions onto those poor pages mercilessly, waiting for Edward to come home, hoping I wouldn't feel so lost anymore.

**AN: I know, Edward and Rosalie are moving really fast. Some of you may not like it, but I think it suits the type of relationship they're going to have. I realize Bella's life essentially sucks at this point, but it's for the sake of her character developing throughout the story line. And, yes, I know Bella's birthday is in September, but I had to change it so I could add in the birthday party and all that fun stuff. Ignore any typos (:**

**Please review! I wanna feel the love!**


	6. Birthday

BPOV

Monday. My 17th birthday. Every year, I thought I'd feel different being a year older. To be honest, I always felt like there was something missing. Especially now. When I woke up, I didn't fight with my alarm clock or glare at any inanimate objects. I slumped out of bed and got into the shower and got ready the way I normally did.

After picking through my closet and finding nothing to be appealing, I settled on a pair of black sweats and a t-shirt. I was sure Alice would try and murder me—she always attempted (and failed miserably) to give me the silent treatment whenever I wore sweats to school. Oh well, it was my birthday. I could wear whatever I wanted. Completely lethargic, I twisted my wet hair into a bun at the back of my head and pinned my bangs back. I didn't bother with any makeup. Knowing me, I'd stab myself in the eye with my mascara wand and go to school looking like I had pink eye. I

I slumped down the stairs to go make a pot of coffee. I needed caffeine. I tapped my foot impatiently while the machine slowly produced my miracle elixir, holding my cup out to it like a bribe. Behind me, I heard the familiar shuffling sounds of a groggy Edward. His footsteps had a very distinct sound in the mornings.

Before I even knew what was happening, I felt his arms snake around my waste I was being suffocated in a rib crushing embrace.

"It's your birthday today," he said in my ear. I turned around and wrapped my arms around him to return the hug and laughed softly.

"Shh," I coaxed. "You aren't supposed to tell anyone."

He snorted. "I threw you a surprise birthday party two days ago…I think people will know today's your birthday." I swallowed back my feelings. _You also left me there to go be with your girlfriend_.

"Well, maybe they'll have forgotten. Chop chop, eat something, we're going to be late," I said, quickly changing the subject. He rolled his eyes.

"You say that every day."

* * *

People didn't forget it was my birthday. Not by a long shot. Upon pulling into the parking lot, I was showered with "happy birthdays" and other "fun" comments from the group. Alice's excitement wore off almost immediately when she saw me.

"Really? Sweats?" She criticized. I shrugged, trying to play it off. "Are they _at least_ designer? Juicy?"

"I don't know, check the tag if you really want to know," I sighed, sarcastically. She immediately yanked on the back of my pants, twisting the waistband back, searching for a designer label. "Alice!" I shrieked, swatting her hands away. She let out a satisfied sigh when she realized I wasn't wearing a outfit acquired from Wal-Mart. Emmett, being the goon that he is, picked me up like a rag doll and paraded me around for everyone to see. People laughed, apparently thinking it was cute.

"Birthday girl, coming through!" he shouted. I huffed, annoyed.

"Em, put me down,." I begged. "This is insane."

"No way," he argued. "You're too special. People need to see your greatness!"

"Well, they can see it while I'm standing on the ground," I hissed. He laughed and set me down. Just as he did my cell phone buzzed. I pulled it out to see that Carlisle was calling.

"Hello?" I asked, holding the device up to my ear. I heard two disappointed sighs on the other end.

"Bella, dear," Esme said. "You weren't supposed to answer. We wanted to sing you happy birthday and leave it as a message."

"You left before I could flag you down this morning," Carlisle chuckled.

"Now, hang up so we can call again, and don't answer," Esme demanded. I was incredulous.

"Um…okay," I said. "Bye." I hung up and felt the phone vibrate again a few seconds later. I waited for it to go to voicemail, but didn't listen to the message because everyone was now nagging about me getting to class on time. During a passing period, I listened to the message, hearing Esme and Carlisle's awkward voices squawk out a song for me. I couldn't help but laugh, feeling a blush creep along the back of my neck and cheeks. At the end of the message, Esme quickly threw in, "We'll be home early! We're all having dinner tonight!"

The rest of the day passed by uneventfully until a few minutes before the final bell. Sure, I'd gotten plenty of unnecessary birthday wishes from people I hardly knew, but just before I was ready to bolt from the classroom and dive into Edward's car, the intercom beeped, letting everyone know there was an upcoming announcement. Then I heard a devilishly familiar voice on the other end.

"Don't forget everyone, today's the amazing, and single, Bella Swan's seventeenth birthday! Wish her a happy birthday if you catch her in the parking lot!"

Alice.

Emmett's booming laughter echoed off the walls of the gym and he scooped me up, towing me towards the locker room.

"Birthday girl, coming through!" he shouted.

"Not again," I moaned. "You're terrible. Put me down." He didn't.

"Oh, come on Bella," he complained while hoisting me above his shoulders. "You do so much for all of us, we're just trying to make your birthday special for you." He dropped me off at the locker room entrance. I dressed quickly, flashing brief smiles at anyone who wished me a happy birthday, and then I went out the back door. It took everything I had not to run across the parking lot to the Volvo. I knew it was pointless—I couldn't get into the car anyway. It would be locked until Edward decided to show up.

I hurried across the parking lot to wait for him. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a streak of perfect blond hair. I turned my head just enough to be able to see Rosalie latched onto Edward's arm. I continued walking toward the car, acting like I hadn't seen anything.

"Bella!" Edward called. I looked over at him and smiled. Rosalie waved, looking extraordinarily happy.

"Hi guys," I said, awkwardly.

"Happy birthday," Rosalie said, reaching forward to pull me into a hug. I recovered from the shock of it quick enough to return the gesture.

"Oh, thanks," I mumbled.

"Jasper's got baseball practice after school today, so I told Rose we'd give her a ride home. Okay with you?" he asked.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be okay with it?" I asked.

"Just checking. You are the birthday girl, after all."

I volunteered to sit in the back seat, not wanting to be rude. Rose protested at first, but I knew she wanted to sit next to Edward in his fancy car. We pulled up to her house, which was nothing short of breathtaking. It seemed as though all of our friends were lucky enough to live in unjustly huge houses. While I'm sure it was supposed to be a sensual moment when Edward kissed Rosalie goodbye, I quickly turned my head to look out the window. _Stop it_, I yelled at myself. _Get over him._

When she left, Edward let out a slow sigh, like he was suddenly exhausted. He started to pull out of the driveway, then stopped suddenly. "Aren't you coming to sit up front?" He asked. _I don't really want to anymore,_ I thought.

"Yeah, hold on," I said instead. The seat was still warm from her. He slowly turned back into my Edward on the way home.

"Mom's cooking tonight, and cake and presents," he said excitedly.

"We already did that, remember?" I asked.

"Yeah, but we didn't give you our presents. Those were for tonight. Gosh, I can't believe you're already seventeen." He mused.

"Oh, shut up," I nearly spat. "You're not that much older than I am. Only a few months, and you act like you're ten years younger than me half the time."

"Whoa there, calm down," he said gently. "Is everything okay, Bella?"

"Everything's fine," I said stubbornly.

"You're lying. What is it?"

"Really, Edward, I'm fine. I'm just hungry. I didn't mean to snap at you." I was lying, and he knew it. Every year, I always imagined what it would be like to have my real parents being the first ones to wish me a happy birthday. I had this horrible fantasy about my mom prancing into my room with a cake at the crack of dawn, singing her heart out just to make sure I had a good day. I didn't like getting older, because the more time that passed, the less I could remember about them. Yes, I loved Esme and Carlisle like they were my birth parents, but I couldn't help but feel lost. And then, with Edward flaunting his new found love in front of me, I felt even more alone.

"Hey," he said softly, putting his hand on my arm. "You know you can talk to me about anything. You're my Bella, nothing is going to change that." He quickly put his hand on the wheel before we completely swerved out of the lane.

"I know, Ed. Maybe later."

When we walked into the house, we were greeted by wonderful smells wafting from the kitchen. Usually, Esme's cooking ended up being a miracle. She would start having no idea of what she was doing and it would turn into something great. We did, however, have a few favorites.

"Lasagna!" Edward cheered as soon as he recognized the aroma. We walked into the kitchen to see Carlisle and Esme standing next to each other. As soon as they saw us, Esme sprang forward and pulled me into her arms.

"Happy birthday," she squealed. "My baby's all grown up!" She rocked me slightly in her arms, and let me go just in time for Carlisle to butt in.

"You were sneaky enough to leave before we could attack you this morning, but you aren't getting away now," he said, pulling me into his warm, fatherly embrace.

"You're cooking…I'm not _that_ special," I joked with him. He laughed and ruffled my hair.

"I'm just making the garlic bread. It's safe enough."

I watched Esme carefully prepare a garden salad while the lasagna cooked in the oven. Carlisle took a fresh baguette and cut it in half, spreading garlic butter on both sides, prepping it to bake to perfection. The timer on the oven had just gone off when my cell phone rang. I pulled it out and answered without checking who it was.

"Hello?"

"Bella, this is Harold," a gruff, exhausted sounding voice said.

"Oh, hey Harold," I said pleasantly.

"I really hate to ask you this, but we're getting slammed here, and it's not even the dinner rush. Can you come in for a couple hours tonight? I'll pay you overtime." My shoulders instantly sagged. I glanced at the clock and saw that it was almost 5:00.

"Can I come in at eight? I'll help close too," I said, hoping I could at least get a couple of hours at home celebrating. Now that Edward and I were older, it was harder to anything as a family.

"That's perfect. Thanks, kid, you're a life saver."

Esme gave me a sympathetic look when I hung up. "Do you really have to go in?"

"He asked me to, I can't say no," I explained. She continued to slice cucumbers, suddenly aggressive, moving the knife is shorter, quicker motions.

"That's not fair. You shouldn't even be working, Bella, especially tonight. It's a _Monday_, for God's sake. You have school! And it's you _birthday. _ You could have said no to him. And you –" she cut off suddenly and gasped. The knife slipped off the cucumber and got her hand instead. Carlisle immediately had a towel wrapped tightly around her palm, applying pressure. My stomach heaved and the floor tilted just slightly.

"Oh my god," I gasped, pinching the bridge of my nose.

"Carlisle, I'm fine," Esme said, "it's just a small cut." She tried to pull her hand away, obviously upset.

"No, it's not. And the bleeding needs to stop," he argued. Edward, who had been lounging on the couch and watching TV, heard the commotion and hurried into the kitchen. He saw the blood on the cutting board, the stained towel, and took in his mother's distressed state.

"Mom? Are you okay?" he asked, clearly panicked.

"I'm fine, dear. Really, your father is overreacting," she said, trying to calm him down.

"What happened?" Edward asked me.

"She's angry with me and cut her hand," I mumbled, and then left the room before I cried in front of everyone. I took several deep breaths and forced my tears to go away while sitting on the foot of the stairs and resting my head in my hands.

"Bella, honey," Esme called after me. She walked out of the kitchen with the towel tied tightly around her hand. I tried not to look at the blood on the rag. She sat down next to me. "I'm not upset with you."

I look over at her, not knowing what to say. "I'm upset with the situation. It's just…you're growing up so fast. I want to hang onto the little girl you used to be, and when things like this happen, it hits me like a train that you aren't a child anymore. You aren't my little Bella anymore, you're my all grown up Bella, with a job and adult responsibilities."

I sighed and rested my head on shoulder. "I'll always be your little Bella on the inside," I said.

"Your mother would be so proud of you," she said. Even though it hurt to hear that, I smiled lightly.

"You think so?" I asked.

"I know so."

* * *

Dinner was delicious. Edward sat down next to me, like he usually did during family dinners. Whenever Carlisle looked away, he would toss his tomatoes onto my plate and smirk. He hated them. He finished eating before everyone and jumped up from the table, hurrying into the kitchen. Moments later, he came back holding a beautiful cake with a giant lit candle in the middle.

"Since you have to leave soon," he said, "We have to do the cake quickly." Esme had gone to my favorite bakery earlier today and picked up a vanilla custard cake with cream cheese frosting. I ate until I thought I would puke.

Carlisle and Esme set a medium sized wrapped box onto the table while I was still finishing my massive slice of cake. I eyed the box wearily.

"Oh come one, open it," Edward jeered. I pulled it toward me to open it, carefully trying not to rip any of the paper. I was utterly shocked when I realized they had gotten me a new laptop.

"You shouldn't have done this!" I gasped. "A MacBook Pro! Thank you!"I pulled them into a hug, knowing there was no use in complaining about the cost of it.

"Don't forget about my present," Edward said, handing me a small box that was tied with a bow. I pulled the bow apart and removed the top. Nestled inside was a beautiful, silver necklace with a pendant in the shape of a 'B' with an 'E' entwined with it. As I looked closer, I noticed an engraving around the letters that said "You'll always be my Bella." Tears sprang to my eyes. I walked over to him and wrapped my arms tightly around him.

"Thank you," I whispered. "I'll never take it off. This means so much to me."

"_You_ mean so much to _me_," he replied. I sniffed loudly and thanked everyone again, A few moments after that, I was hurrying to get ready for work. I put my necklace on and tucked it under my shirt, then I was flying out the door to get to work on time. When I got there, the parking lot was packed. Thank God for employee parking.

When I walked into the kitchen, I was surprised to see how well Jacob was doing. He smiled brightly when he saw me.

"Bella!" he said. "Finally!" I quickly grabbed my apron and rushed over to the tables in the dining room.

"Hey Jake," I said, smiling back at him.

"You know, I was looking over at Becky's calendar earlier. Is today your birthday?" he asked.

"Uh, yeah," I answered casually.

He sucked in a deep breath. "Crap, that's sucky."

"It's no big deal," I said. "I'm getting paid, can't complain."What I really wanted to do was scream and throw a temper tantrum on the floor. Too late for that.

He shrugged."Well, I guess you're right. There's this guy who came in earlier tonight and was asking for you. He's kind of creepy." I groaned.

"He is! He's got the whole "Hester the molester' vibe going on." Jacob threw his head back and laughed. He put his arm around my shoulder.

"Well, happy birthday, then. Let's go wait some tables together."

The night passed quickly, but I was exhausted. I was thankful for it though; working helped take my mind off of things that had been running through my head all day. Plus, Jake was pretty fun to work with. He'd picked up the tricks quickly. I also caught on to his sorry attempts at flirting. They made me laugh, nonetheless. When we finally closed, I practically dragged myself to my car and magically made it home in one piece. It was almost 11:30 when I finally got upstairs to my room.

I grabbed the pajamas that I'd laid out on my nightstand earlier and went into my bathroom to shower. I just let the warm water run over my body for a few moments so I could relax. When I got out, I threw my hair back into a messy bun and pulled on my pj's.

Edward was waiting for me on my bed when I got out. I was startled and jumped a little.

"You scared me," I mumbled, laughing slightly. He patted the spot next to him. I crawled across the bed and plopped down next to him. I rested my head against the pillow and sighed.

"Are you ready to talk yet?" he asked.

"About what?" I replied.

"Whatever it is that's bothering you. It's written all over your face."

I closed my eyes and shook my head. I didn't want to talk. He wouldn't understand, he'd just think I was an ungrateful person. Probably a psycho.

"Please? It's killing me not knowing what's on your mind."

I sighed, feeling my chest clench uncomfortably.

"I feel kind of empty on my birthday, that's all," I said quietly. He looked concerned and ran his hand through his hair.

"Why?"

"I…" I trailed off, feeling the tears coming.

"Bella?"

"I miss my mom and dad." I said shakily. "And they aren't here to see me grow older. Every year that passes, it gets harder for me to remember them, and I feel so _horrible_ for doing it. How can I forget them? What kind of daughter am I?" I felt hot tears burning my cheeks. They dotted my pillow case, wetting the fabric.

"Oh, Bella," Edward whispered, catching the next tear that fell and brushing it off my face. "I'm so sorry."

"I feel like it's my fault, Edward," I choked out. "And I don't want to forget them. I keep trying to hold on, but I can't do it. I can't. I don't even remember the accident." I'd always hoped for the stereotypical last memory of them, with the blinding headlights just before the crash, but no. I didn't remember _anything_.

He reached over and pulled me into his chest while I cried, soaking his shirt. He ran his free hand over my hair repeatedly, murmuring comforting words, trying to calm me down. "It's not your fault, you can't blame yourself for something like that. It was an accident," he whispered in my ear.

"I wish it didn't feel that way," I shook out. I eventually fell asleep, wrapped comfortably in his arms, lulled into unconsciousness by his rhythmic breathing.

When I woke up, it was 3:00 am, and Edward was gone. He'd tucked me under my blankets and even arranged my pillows just the way I liked them. Feeling restless, I tossed and turned for the next hour before settling into a light slumber, catching a few more hours of rest before getting up to face the world again.

**AN: Hey everyone! I have a little game to play now. In either a review or a PM, send me your favorite quote, saying, or just a phrase that you find to be completely hilarious. I'll incorporate the best one of them all into the next chapter. **

**Let me know what you thought of the chapter - hopefully some of you picked up on the foreshadowing I threw in there ;)Sorry for any typos...Thanks for the reviews and support!  
**


	7. Emily

BPOV

Everything went well for the next couple of months. At least, everything went as well as it possibly could. Edward and Rosalie continued to work on their relationship, still fawning over eachother, and I picked up a few extra shifts to get away from them. Working, all though it completely stressed me out sometimes, helped me clear my head.

Jake somehow managed to convince me to give him my phone number. He claimed it was in case of an emergency. Even though that was practically a lie, I gave it to him anyway. He deserved credit for trying. Harold still thought he needed training, so we often had the same shifts together, and Jake usually followed me around like a lost puppy, asking questions that he already knew the answers to. I couldn't decide whether to be annoyed or flattered.

Aside from being constantly pestered by Alice and her incessant reminders about the upcoming school dance, and Edward growing increasingly distant, nothing had changed.

On a Thursday afternoon, Esme came home unusually early, huffing as she carried her bags through the door.

"Oh, good, I was hoping to catch the both of you here," she said, while pulling her hair into a ponytail and kicking off her shoes.

"Hey, Mom," Edward mumbled, looking over at her lazily. We both were completely lounging on the couches in the living room, watching reruns of an old sitcom that wasn't really funny.

"How was your day?" I asked, peering over the edge of the sofa. My hair was falling out of my bun, loose strands of hair covering my face. Esme leaned over, brushed my bangs back, and kissed my forehead. She sat down next to Edward and sighed as she wrapped her arm around his shoulders and kissed his cheek.

"Oh, it was just a day," she replied, chewing her lip nervously. Edward gazed over at her.

"What is it?" he asked, hesitant.

"I need the both of you to do me a favor," she started.

"Sure, anything you need," I said, sitting up and beginning to refix my hair.

"Well, as you both know, your father and I - er, Carlisle and I - are going to a conference this weekend in Portland. A colleague of his, Leah, is going as well, but she needs someone to watch her child, so I volunteered you two to do it." She flashed us a quick smile and fussed with her blouse. Edward shot up in alarm.

"Mom!" he exclaimed. She threw her hands up, ready to argue.

"I wasn't thinking when I offered! And it's only for two days..."

"Two days?" he cried.

"Oh, come on Edward, it can't be that bad. I mean, how old is she?" I asked, trying to be optimistic.

"Well, she's almost three."

"Esme!" I cried, joining Edward's side of the argument. "Two?"

Esme put her hands on her hips and glared at us. "You're both seventeen years old, you can handle this responsibility. I'm sure you can afford to sacrafice one of your precious weekends, and don't try and tell me you're working, Bella. I know you aren't. And Edward, you can put your social life on hold for a little while."

"But, I don't know _anything_ about babies, and why would she trust two complete strangers with her child?" he whined.

"Honestly, she's two. Not six months old, and Leah will provide you with a very extensive list of certain instructions and phone numbers. She hasn't been in town very long. She has no family here, and this conference could be the pinnacle of her career. Most of watching her is just a combination of maternal instincts and common sense. Between the two of you, there should be no problems. Leah will be bringing her by tomorrow around five. I expect the both of you to be here. No excuses."

"Ugh," Edward sighed, putting his head in his hands.

"Whats her name?" I asked, my palms sweaty.

"Her name is Emily," Esme said, standing up from the couch. "I'll order takeout tonight."

* * *

"Babysitting?" Emmett burst out laughing, spraying sandwich bits everywhere. "Oh my god, your life totally sucks."

Alice smacked his arm and scowled. "Shut up, Em. Imagine if Mom made us do that." She took a bite of her salad and chewed quickly. "You know this means you can't go dress shopping this weekend, right? We don't have much time left."

"Yes, Alice," I sighed, "I'm well aware of that fact. Three weeks is more than enough time for you to find a dress, and I'm not going, so you're welcome to find something without me."

Alice groaned and rolled her eyes. "We'll talk about this later."

The rest of the day went by too quickly. My stomach churned nervously the entire way home. Edward was brooding while he drove. "Are you as nervous as I am?" I asked.

"How bad can it be? I mean, we only have to make sure she doesn't eat potting soil or jam her fingers into any electrical outlets," he replied sarcastically.

"We have to feed her, and bathe her, and put her to bed, and -" I started to list.

"I know, Bella," he said hotly. "My mom obviously trusts us, I'm sure we'll be okay. Spongebob works wonders for kids from what I hear, and we have gummy bears and fruit roll-ups."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," I mumbled. I still raced into my room and hid anything dangerous valuable in the closet as soon as we got home. Without a doubt, Edward did the same thing. Because I still had a couple of hours to kill before Leah came over, I decided to bake a few things, some snacks for Emily to munch on that weren't processed in a factory.

I preheated the oven and pulled out the ingredients for chocolate chip cookies, beginning to mix everything together. When I finished, I set the bowl aside and began to mix together some sugar cookies, tossing in some rainbow sprinkles for aesthetic purposes. When I was scooping chunks onto the baking sheets, Edward came up behind me and dipped his finger into the bowl, scooping out a large chunk and eating it immediately.

"Yum," he said, going for seconds. I smiled and swatted his hand away.

"Dont eat too much. Chances are, you'll get sick and I'll be stuck doing this all alone." In the back of my mind, I knew I shouldn't have been so nervous. I'd babysat many times before, and I was good with kids. I was more worried about Edward not being able to handle it. He wasn't _terrible_ with kids...he just wasn't 'Edward the Purple Dinosaur'.

Just after the cookies had finished cooling on the rack, the doorbell rang. "I'll get it!" Esme called as she hurried down the stairs. She'd come home early again to pack for the trip. Moments after that, an adorable little girl, sporting blond pigtails and a teddybear, tumbled her way into the kitchen, almost knocking into me.

"Emily!" I heard someone, obviously her mother, call. Seconds later, a tall woman bearing a striking resemblance to the little girl hurried into the kitchen and scooped her into her arms.

"I'm so sorry," she huffed. "She's so excited. You must be Bella." Leah extended her hand toward me and I grasped it.

"I am, you must be Leah," I said with a smile. Emily buried her head into Leah's shoulder, making her tiny pigtails bounce.

"I am, and this is Emily. Emily, say 'hi' to Bella," she encouraged. Emily picked her head up off of Leah's collarbone and peered at me for one second. She grinned and then buried her face again.

"Edward!" Esme called. "Leah and Emily are here!" She popped into the kitchen, emulating an unnatural ammount of energy for five o'clock in the evening. "Oh, Bella, you made cookies," she said with a smile. "Bella is fantastic in the kitchen."

When Edward came downstairs, Leah handed over several lists of telephone numbers in case of emergencies, explained their daily routines and any odd quirks Emily had. She also gave us details about her favorite foods and anything else we could possibly know about her, like the fact that she was almost potty trained, but not quite there yet. She'd also brought along a crib, high chair, and car seat for our conveniences.

"She doesn't normally sleep in a crib, but I couldn't fit her bed in my car. be fine though," Leah explained. The baby was happily chewing on a cookie when she kissed her goodby an hurried out the door.

Carlise and Esme soon followed, leaving the three of us to ourselves. I'd been mentally preparing myself for pure hell the moment the parents left, but Emily was perfectly content slobbering on freshly baked goods.

"The cookies were a good idea," Edward commented, maneuvering awkwardly around the little girl who was perched on our countertop.

"She's pretty quiet," he mumbled, pulling a waterbottle out of the fridge. A few hours later, we both realized just how wrong he was.

By the time it was 8:00, Emily had managed to dump a cup of grape juice all over herself, flick macaroni and cheese along the entirity of the wall, and hurl chicken nuggets at me and Edward.

"She's a demon!" Edward exclaimed as I scrubbed caked cheese off the wall in the dining room. I shot him a glare and quickly glanced at Emily, who was kicking away in her high chair.

"Do you really have to say things like that? She's _right _ there, Ed. And she's probably only acting out because she's insecure without her mom here. Haven't you noticed how she keeps calling me 'mama' and then throwing something at me when I don't magically turn into Leah?"

He stared at me, silently, before shuffling over to Emily and plucking her out of her seat. Though he looked uncomfortable, he held her against his chest, swaying slightly. My heart lodged in my throat as I watched her slowly relax in his arms. After a few moments, he carried her over to the living room, where he flipped on Nick Jr.

"Maybe you should get her bath ready?" he asked softly. I was dumbfounded. Digging through one of the many diaper bags Leah had dropped off, I marveled in Edward's drastic behavior change. Once I got ahold of the baby wash, I hurried upstairs to get everything ready for her, suddenly feeling incredibly calm. She cooperated while we gave her a bath, only fussing when I had to rinse water over her head to get the shampoo out of her hair.

"Look at these pajamas I found for her," Edward said, laughing as he walked into the room. He held up a pink onesie with teddy bears all over it. After carefully drying her off and changing her into her special night time diaper, I helped her into the clothes and carried her to my room where Edward was snapping her crib together. She reached for her blanket as soon as she saw it draped across the foot of my bed.

"Bug!" she cried. Like every child, she'd come to know her baby blanket by a special name, which just so happened to be Bugaboo. It was difficult getting her to bed. Emily was terrified of falling asleep without her mother there. Everytime her eyes would flutter shut, she'd startle herself away and cry out for mama. It eventually took us calling Leah and letting Emily hear her voice before she fell alseep.

Edward excused himself from the room while I changed into some more comfortable clothes, returning in his own pajamas and bearing two plates of finger foods.

"I thought you might be hungry," he whispered, dimming the lights in the room. "I know I am."

I nodded and eyed the plate, my mouth watering. "Thank you," I mumbled, patting the spot next to me on the bed while shoving a mini corndog into my mouth. He scooted next to me and chewed on his food slowly.

"Would you mind if I stayed in here with you tonight?" he asked, his voice quiet.

"Huh?" I squeaked.

"I don't really feel comfortable leaving you alone with Emily tonight."

My eyebrows pulled together in confusion and I swatted my bangs out of my eyes.

"Oh, you don't think I can handle it?" I hissed, irritated. Edward placed his hand on my shoulder to steady me.

"No, I don't think you would have any problems handling it. I just don't feel like it's very fair if I leave you alone with her and she keeps you up. Leah did say she wakes up a lot throughout the night."

"Oh," I said softly, instantly regretting my mini blow up. "Thank you."

We finished eating together, and I couldn't help but glance nervously at Edward every ten seconds. It wasn't like we hadn't ever slept in the same bed before - we'd grown up together. Knowing that he was in a serious relationship with an inhumanly gorgeous girl, knowing how out of control my feelings for him were, knowing we'd never be anything more than friends, all of those factors were more than likely contributing to my anxiety.

I crawled under my thick blankets and felt his hand graze across the exposed skin on my stomach, sending shivers down my spine.

"I haven't asked Rosalie to the dance yet," he whispered, rolling over to face me. I looked over at him, surprised to find his eyebrows knit together.

"Why not?" I mumbled. Rose had seemed perfectly at ease when Alice was blabbering on about her plans for an after party and what type of corsage she wanted.

"I don't know," he answered. "I'm not sure if she really wants to go."

"Oh, trust me, Edward. She wants to go. What are you waiting for?" I pulled the blankets tighter around my shoulders.

"I'm not really waiting for anything, Bella. I think she's just assuming we're going together." He sighed and shifted around.

"Is that a bad thing?"I asked.

"No, it's not a bad thing. I just don't know whether I should ask her or assume she knows we're going together."

My heart sank. "You should ask her," I advised, pretending to yawn so the conversation.

"Goodnight, Bella," he whispered, kissing my forehead gently before rolling back over.

"Goodnight," I whispered back, closing my eyes and slowly settling into a light slumber. It felt like I had just fallen asleep when I was startled awake by a sharp, piercing cry. I jumped out the bed and hurried over to the crib, picking up Emily before her cries escalated.

"Shh," I comforted. "It's alright, you're okay." I held her against my shoulder while she whined, rubbing her back mechanically until she fell back asleep. Then I slumped back to the bed and curled into a ball, exhausted.

EPOV

I woke up because my legs were completely tangled in the sheets. When I realized that I was also stealing the majority of the blankets, I did my best to rearrange them over Bella's tiny frame, not being very successful. With a sigh, I climbed out of the bed and pulled the blankets over her. Just for good measures, I looked over at the crib in the corner of the room and nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw Emily standing up, her tiny hands laced through the bars.

I shuffled over to her and picked her up. She felt so tiny in my arms, so breakable. It was ludicrous how such a fragile, innocent little girl could be such a... liability at all times.

"What are you doing up?" I whispered. "Can't sleep, huh, Emily?" She just stared at me. "Yeah, neither can I."

This time, Emily pointed over at the bed. I looked over and saw the alarm clock. It was 2:47 am. "Yes, it's early in the morning," I stated. She squirmed in my arms and pointed again, popping her thumb into her mouth.

"Oh, you mean Bella?" I asked. Emily smiled at buried her head into my chest. "She's pretty, isn't she?" I asked.

"Pretty!" Emily shouted.

"Shh!" I said quickly, wanting to cover her mouth before she made any more noise. "You'll wake her up, silly girl. And you should go back to sleep, too." Clearly not understanding, she bounced in my arms happily, her blond curls framing her face.

"No, Emily," I said, trying to sound firm. "Sleep."

It took almost an hour before I got her back in the crib. I knew I should have been tired, but I just didn't feel like it. Emily had this way of making you think. I gazed over at Bella, sleeping soundly, only occasionally muttering something, her hair fanned out across the pillow and her shoulders. She looked so peaceful, but at the same time, terrifyingly vulnerable, like the weight of the world would suddenly come tumbling down and crush her. I felt the sudden urge to hold her in my arms, to cradle her and keep her safe. If only I could tell her what I knew, then everything might make sense to her. I just didn't have it in me to do it.

It was only lately that Bella seemed so lost. Ever since her birthday. I wanted nothing more than to be able to fit the tattered pieces of her life together. I wanted to be the one to make everything okay for her. It was obvious, at least to me, that she was not okay, and every time she said she was "fine" was a lie. She'd been throwing herself into that back breaking job waitressing - a job she didn't even need - and completely throwing herself into her school work when she wasn't working.

We hadn't spent any quality time together lately, though I couldn't blame Bella for that. Rosalie and I had spent almost every day together, always going out on some form of a date. Whenever I'd get home after being with her, Bella would either be asleep or busy doing something spectacular, like cooking up a masterpiece in the kitchen or studying until she fell asleep on top of her textbooks.

I ran my fingers through my hair and shook my head. _Get a grip on yourself. It's Bella, she's not going anywhere. _ After crawling back into bed, I wrapped my arms around my pillow and forced myself to go back to sleep knowing that I wouldn't be much help tomorrow if I didn't get any rest tonight.

"Emily! No!" I was startled awake by Bella's frantic cry and I felt her body lurch out of the bed. I popped open my eyes, panicking, and saw Bella grab the small child, who was perched dangerously on the edge of the bars, trying to climb out.

"Are you crazy?" she hissed. "God, you probably don't even understand what I'm saying. No climbing," she ordered. "Use your words. No climbing." I sat up and moved forward just as Bella slumped back onto the bed with Emily in her arms.

"Everything okay?" I asked, scooting closer to her. She growled and looked over at. me.

"No. She just tried to dive off of her crib onto the floor." She ran her fingers through Emily's tangled curls. I looked over at the alarm clock.

"Well, it is 8:30, Bells. She's probably been up for a while," I tried to reason. Bella shot me a glare and I cringed.

"Well...if it's any constallation, you're hair looks wonderful like a hay stack," I said, flashing her a grin.

"Thanks," she said dryly. I reached over and put my arm around her shoulders.

"Hey, I'm just kidding. Relax," I said smoothly. "She's been ready to party since 2:30 this morning."

"Seriously?" she asked. "Why didn't you wake me up?"

I shrugged and stretched out my arms. "It was no big deal. I was up anyway."

"Because...?" she asked. "Edward you have bags under your eyes. You need sleep."

"I wasn't tired," I lied. She stared at me, silently demanding the truth. "I just had a lot on my mind and was up thinking, then Emily kept me company for a while."

Bella sighed and stood up. "I'll watch her for a few hours. Go back to bed," she ordered. I stood up in protest.

"No, really, I'm not tired. But I am hungry. How about breakfast?" I asked, quickly changing the subject. She sighed and agreed, thumping down the stairs while Emily sang a happy song that was unrecognizable. Just before I was going to follow them, my cell phone rang, buzzing on the nightstand.

"Hello?" I asked, holding the receiver to my ear.

"Hi, Edward. This is Leah, I'm just calling to check in, is everything going okay?" she asked.

"Absolutely," I answered, quickly. "Bella and Emily just went downstairs to make some breakfast."

"Oh, that's great ," she sighed into the phone. "Has she been causing any problems?" she asked, sounding nearly hysterical.

"Not at all," I lied. "She's an angel, and we haven't run into any problems." The conversation ended shortly after that and I hurried downstairs to help with breakfast. I found Bella standing in front of the griddle with pancakes forming on them. Emily was on the counter next to her with her hands submerged in the batter bowl, an adorable grin on her face.

"Um...Bella?" I asked, careful not to startle her.

"Yeah?" she replied, pleasantly.

"You do realize that she's elbow deep in pancake batter, right?" I asked.

"Yup," she replied, twrirling her spatula. "She wanted to be my helper."

"Okay," I said, biting my cheek to keep from laughing. "How about I go clean her up while you finish?"

"Sounds great," she replied shortly, and I plucked Emily off the counter and carried her while she wiped her fingers all over my shirt, giggling at the stains.

That was how the rest of the weekend went.

By the time Sunday afternoon rolled around, Bella and I were exhausted. Leah thanked us over and over again when she came to pick Emily up, raving at what a wonderful job we did. To be honest, watching her wasn't a bad experience at all, it was just tiring. I collapsed the moment I hit my pillows after that, only waking up the next morning to Bella's soft knocking on the door.

I groaned and rolled over, burrowing my head into the down comforter.

"Edward?" she inquired, slowly cracking open the door. I grunted and shook my head, stubbornly.

"Do I really have to get up?" I complained. "Can't you get my dad to write us a note or something?"

"Er, no," she said, shyly. "But I made breakfast, and you've still got some extra time. Maybe you should take a shower, it'll wake you up," she suggested. I looked up at her and offered a small smile. She turned to leave, almost making no noise.

"Bella?" I asked, trying to get her to stop. She looked over her shoulder and raised an eyebrow. I sat up, letting the covers fall from my shoulders and looked directly at her, trying to work past the grogginess. "Thank you."

"For what?" she asked.

"Everything."

After getting ready and driving us to school, I decided I'd take Bella's advice and ask Rosalie to the dance. I wasn't really looking forward to going, at least, not with Rose. She was great in every aspect, but she just wasn't the girl for me. That much I could tell—she was a good distraction. And, of course, she agreed without hesitation when I casually asked her.

School was especially boring for a Monday, and our lunch hour wasn't very eventful. Alice babbled happily, buzzing with excitement while announcing her party and shopping plans. Rosalie chimed in, throwing her ideas out there, and then they both dragged Bella into it, making her promise she'd go with them. I saw her shoulders wilt, but she agreed after a heavy argument.

"Why don't you and Emmett go as friends, Bella?" Rosalie threw out there.

"I actually have a date," Emmett said, talking for the first time the entire break.

"With who?" Alice demanded. "I'm your sister, why don't I already know this?"

Emmett rolled his eyes. "I'm going with Lauren." The table got quiet. He peered over at Bella, who was ripping her napkin into shreds. "Sorry, Bells," he said, reaching over and squeezing her shoulder.

"It's okay, Em. Don't worry about it," she said, quietly. I felt a rock drop into the core of my stomach as I saw her face crumple. By the end of the day, I so desperately wanted to check on her, to make sure she was okay. I spotted her waiting at my car, playing with the necklace I'd given her on her birthday.

"How was the rest of your day?" I asked, pulling her into a hug. She shrugged in my arms.

"It was fine, yours?" she asked, walking around the car to get inside.

"It was boring," I replied sliding into my seat. We drove home in silence, steady raindrops plopping on the windshield.

"Bella, are you sure you want to go to the dance?" I finally asked. She looked startled.

"Yeah, I'm sure. Actually, I'm thinking I might ask friend of mine to go with me as my date," she said, staring out the window. Now I was the startled one.

"Oh, who?" I asked, trying to delay my response to not sound too concerned.

"His name's Jake."

**Hi everyone! Sorry for the late update, I was on vacation and couldn't get to a computer. The website doesn't let me upload files from my iPhone, so I couldn't do anything until I got home. Anyway, please let me know if you have any questions. **

**Just thought I would let everyone know: Edward DID NOT confess any form of undying love towards Bella in this chapter. He's simply being very protective. I thought you guys might like to see Edward's perspective for a change. **


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